Back in the late 90′s I was Eeyore.
Yes.
Eeyore.
And I experienced everything a walking donkey with a bow on his tail should experience.
The next job I had after I got fired from Disney was working for a church.
Appropriate if you ask me.
Working as Eeyore at Disneyland taught me everything I needed to know about working in ministry.
1. Never, ever, come out of character. This includes when a small child (parishioner) kicks you square in the balls (tells you your sermon sucks)
2. If it gets hotter than 90 degrees we are allowed to take twice as many breaks so we wouldn’t pass out in character.
If you start taking lots of heat, don’t be scared to take a break. It’s good for you and your church for you to not publically meltdown for the world to see.
3. When I was alone and signing autographs I had a long line of kids with glasses who wanted a hug. I felt so loved. Then Tigger showed up, everybody left my line to go hug Tigger.
Listen, there will be more fun loving, popular pastors than you. Get over it and just hug the people in front of you. Even if it’s just one.
4. About 10% of my workweek I got to suit up as Buzz Lightyear. I went from being a depressed donkey to a cocky astronaut. It was the best 4 hours of my week and I ALWAYS was a better Eeyore after a stint as Buzz.
Don’t just study for your sermon. Go volunteer doing something that will stretch you. Become an expert in something else besides preaching. Your preaching will improve and you won’t be a depressed donkey.
5. 9 times out of 10 Minnie Mouse is a 4’11″ male Vietnamese refugee and smokes while on break.
Don’t be a completely different pastor off stage than you are on stage.
You will soon be found out and lose your calling because your head smells like smoke when you put it back on and go hug the children. Wait… Yea. You get it.
