Kanye’s A Joke

I looked her straight in the eye.
“NO! I didn’t look at porn! I hit the wrong URL and it went there for a second babe! I closed the page right away!”
I remember yelling this back in 2004.
All the while knowing not only did I type it in on purpose, but I knew that url as well as my own cell phone number.
Sooner than later it came out and suck ensued.
Back to no trust, walls build up, and a slow regaining of trust.
Luckily, the times this has happened in my marriage, whether my wife believed my futile attempt of an apology or not, she chose to forgive.
Why? Because as lame as this sounds…That’s what Jesus would have done.
Yes there were consequences for my actions.
But in the end I was forgiven for the sinner I was.
Knowing that I would surely screw it up again.

Kanye screwed up the other night.
He knows there are consequences for his actions.
I deleted his music off my laptop.
Will he ever know?
Nope. But you do.
Last night he gave a futile attempt at an apology on Leno.

Do I believe him?
Not really. Well Maybe. Nah. Um. It doesn’t matter.
Do I choose to forgive him?
Yup.
I twittered this 2 nights ago…

It’s so much harder to live out this faith I walk then it is to call Kanye a joke.
And at the end of the day…
If Kanye’s a joke…

Then So Is Carlos.
Los
P.S. I hope he wins a grammy next year and Vick wins the Superbowl.

http://intensedebate.com/people/klreed189 klreed189

In this post you stirred about 3 or 4 emotions for me. First i got upset because you were defending Mike Vick but not Kanye, then I started to realize that we are all sinners and that you were coming back to defending Kanye and others, then it went back to Kanye being a joke, but in the end you tie it all together…."Kanye is a joke and so is carlos"

Great point and I hope this brings some closure to this subject matter.
It is liek what @prodigaljohn said on twitter today: If we all had our worst mistake televised we'd give kanye west grace instead of hate."

Kanye is a joke
and so is Kyle

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Amen

http://intensedebate.com/people/MarcoWill Marcus Williamson

So tru bro. I concur with both of you

http://intensedebate.com/people/pinkhairedgirl Crystal Renaud

i thought Leno was great with him … and that's all i have to say about this.

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Gracias

http://intensedebate.com/people/pinkhairedgirl Crystal Renaud

but i will say this it is completely apparent that the dude has some serious pain. i am glad that Leno gave him the opportunity to be heard and i am hoping that what we saw was legit. cause what i saw, was one really broken man in need of love and a Savior. and whole lotta grace.

http://www.bricebohrer.com Brice Bohrer

And you saw that Leno's show hopefully won't be on the air too long. Snooz fest. And it is still Leno. (I know off topic…not spiritual and all…)

http://intensedebate.com/people/dewde dewde

"and suck ensued"

If I ever write a book, may I borrow this for the title?

peace | dewde

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Yes.

http://www.rhettsmith.com Rhett Smith

that is the best title ever….i have another title in mind but not appropriate for public consumption

http://intensedebate.com/people/dewde dewde

haha!

http://briancrussell.net bman

I guess it all goes around and comes around, but seriously, this isn’t the first time Kanye’s done/said something really stupid. And yeah, we all screw up, but I think people are blowing this whole thing out of proportion on both ends of the spectrum.

On the one hand, sure we should forgive him. But, he didn’t hurt me. What do I care? I’ve thought he was an idiot for a long time. I’ve never listened to his music, but you’ve gotta love quotes from a guy who claims that he’d be in the new version of the Bible…

But on the other side too, where people are saying he’s the most horrible person ever. He’s not. Stupidity is one thing, but it doesn’t make you a horrible person, just an idiot. You know?

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Yup. Your comment sounds like you are talking about me! LOL.
Great points.

http://www.robertpooley.org Robert Pooley

I think my first band in high school was called, “And Suck Ensued!” What a strange coincidence that is!
All kidding aside, great thoughts Los…

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Thanks Robert! Great band name

http://morethanuseless.com Tom

When you start thinking about forgiving someone for doing something like this, you realize how hard it can be – and Kanye's just one person.

It's pretty humbling to realize that we've done worse (and will continue do worse) yet, despite all this, He already forgave every one of us.

Intense.

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

yup.

http://CincyMissionary.com Jeff Flowers

I agree, Kanye’s a joke. But, it doesn’t surprise me. He’s become famous by sticking his foot in his mouth, right?

I guess talent covers a multitude of sins.

As far as deleting the music. I’m curious as to why? Because he acted out in public? No slam intended here, just curious?

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Because I couldn't think of anything else to do to let him know I was pissed.
Now if his next album is a smash, I'm buying it.

http://www.jenniclayville.com Jenni

you know… we were all with you that night. we were shocked and all a bit pissed at his actions. but i've been thinking about it too.

we've all failed. we're all bound to fail again. we MUST extend grace to all just as we were granted that. we don't know what goes on behind closed doors for kanye. we don't know what demons he wrestles with. we DO know he's human though, therefore, he deserves grace and forgiveness whether he's sincere in his apology or not.

that doesn't mean i'm going to ever buy any of his albums again or go to his concerts.

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Good words Jenni.

http://videoworshipbackgrounds.com Daniel Roberts

Wow, way to take an insignificant something that happened to someone else somewhere on the west coast and really bring it home. I remember the day I came clean with my wife (then girlfriend) "and suck ensued." Actually opening up to someone I knew loved me unconditionally was a relief.

It kind of all reminds me of David Bazan's "God Bless This Mess"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eu1qgHD4Ff0

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Oh yea. I figure it is not insignificant to Kanye or Taylor, so it should be brought home.

http://intensedebate.com/people/kbarger Keith Barger

So many thoughts on this. I don't really listen to Kanye. Didn't listen to Taylor either. But I will be buying her music now.
Kanye played the fool, but Taylor will ultimately benefit from the whole thing. And if Kanye lives up to what he said on J, he will too.

Thank God for showing us what grace looks like.

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Preach. And how does Fri morn look

http://intensedebate.com/people/kbarger Keith Barger

Should work. I'll just have to move the iMac to a todler-free environment…

http://twitter.com/joshua_w_hunt @joshua_w_hunt

who are we to judge when we've all done something just as stupid if not worse than what Kanye did….we just haven't had it broadcasted over MTV, VH1, CNN, NBC, ABC….you get the idea.

My Savior is the same Savior who died for Kanye and his sins…

thank you for being transparent.

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

true.

Art Good

Should Kanye be forgiven? Absolutely. Should he think twice before embarrassing a 19 year old country music darling on national TV again in the Twitter/Youtube era? You better believe it!

I hope Kanye finds Jesus somehow.
Anya

I haven’t read all the comments so maybe this will be repetetive. But Kanye has always been this way, this wasn’t even the first stunt he’s pulled at an awards show. I don’t understand why everyone is trying to make some sort of statement by saying they’re deleting his music from their iTunes because of his latest stunt. If you are doing it because you disapprove of his actions then why was it okay for you to have his music before now? It’s definitely not a new behavior pattern. I knew he was a jerk and an idiot but I liked some of his music and appreciated his talent anyway. It would seem strange for me to stop listening to it because of something that is completely in keeping with his character and past behavior.
http://Sammahlstadt.wordpress.com Sam Mahlstadt

You know the ultimate way for Kanye to apologize, and the ultimate way for her to accept that apology and forgive him? Make music together. That’s what they do, create. He stepped all over her creation, so help her create something new. Together. Then serve each other communion. Or just do a song, whatever.

http://intensedebate.com/people/gbrenna Graham Brenna

Haha… basically "Hug It Out". I like it. I don't think Taylor will want to collaborate with him. Just sayin'

http://Sammahlstadt.wordpress.com Sam Mahlstadt

She may not want to, but it would be pretty sweet. And yes, as Ari would say, Hug it out!

Art Good

It wouldn’t do no.thing to help her career. She blows him out of the water already.

johntboyd2

well, the key word in your 5 AM post was “proudly”. Any time I do anything with pride and not intense desire to please Father, I am just being a prideful skank. I hate doing the right thing for the wrong reaso, only to kick myself for not being able to enjoy doing the right thing cause I feel like such a hypocrite that I did it with pride and selfishness.

That being said… Los is a joke. And so is John Boyd.
adam

meh, the last thing i care about is some loudmouth like kanye west. sure, i hope he finds Jesus and all, but there are many better lessons on forgiveness out there.

he's a turd, so am i, there are consequences for our actions yada yada.

i don't have anything to forgive him for.. maybe taylor does. i just don't care about pop culture all that much i guess..
http://intensedebate.com/people/dennarr dennarr

Three thoughts:

1. I've had "and suck ensued" situations & moments in my 22 years of marriage and am so thankful for the (1) grace of my Lord and Savior and (2) the god-loving wife that He blessed me with. Los – your transparency if so refreshing and needed in the body of Christ.

2. As to Kanye. He seemed sincere and I won’t judge his heart. [Ouch…the plank in my eye just hit the monitor!]

3. Last week, during The Nines, someone tweeted, "several of these [videos] on humilty. What does that say about chrch leadrs?" My retweeted response: "…/ they R sinful, fallen & need a savior too." Church leaders, followers, singers, students, housewives, homeless, executives – we all a scummy sinners. I think we forget that…I know I do.

Delete, not delete, listen to, not to listen to,…it’s a personal decision. What we each (as Christ Followers) certainly need to do (with Kanye or anyone else for that matter) is balance our desire/actions to defend the wronged with the grace that we ALL have received (ALL – not just those of us who have had "and suck ensued" moments). Jesus defended…without sinning (though He didn’t need grace). We ought to strive for that.

Thanks!
Your fellow joker

http://www.twitter.com KT

Maybe I missed the comment…but it doesn’t seem like anyone on here realizes that Kayne as of today at noon had NOT attempted to actually get in touch with Taylor herself to say he was sorry. Saying it on your blog doesn’t count. Going on Leno and saying it doesn’t count. Having your “people” say it doesn’t count.

Give me a break, grow up, and stop with the fake tear attempt.

This works the same way in religion: you have to ask Christ for forgiveness, he doesn’t just automatically assume or hear it second-hand.

http://intensedebate.com/people/dennarr dennarr

I guess my thing is, I really don't "care" if he asks Taylor for forgiveness. It is certainly the honorable thing to do – even biblical (which, as a Christ Follower means more to me than people's impressions). Even if Kanye did apologize, some would doubt his sincerity. I like how Adam (above) put it, "i don't have anything to forgive him for.. maybe taylor does."

One thing that drives me nuts is when we, as non-participants in something, expect to know all the deets AND approve of the results and reconciliation. It's maddening. [I'm sure that at dozens of Proverbs about this!]

Amen to your final sentence! The only solution to my "they R sinful, fallen & need a savior too." comment is exactly as you laid it out: confessing, repenting, and accepting…personally.

Peace!

http://faywrites.tumblr.com Fay

Well said, Los. Same thing goes for Serena. Thank God only He has access to our thoughts because we've all wanted to pull a Kanye/Serena at some point. If thinking it the same as doing it, we're all Kanyes and Serenas in need of grace and a Savior.
http://intensedebate.com/people/gbrenna Graham Brenna

You know… when I saw this event happen live I initially went to Taylor's defense as the rest of the world did. I even called Kanye a "crass punk" (http://bit.ly/y1uCA ) after I formulated my own opinion of his apology on Leno last night. But you're right Los, we can pass judgment on him all we want but we should really forgive him. Even if we believe he was insincere with his apology. I just pray he reflects on it sometime and does in fact repent.

http://intensedebate.com/people/klreed189 klreed189

Don't worry, our president called him a Jackass

http://www.mysonabsalom.com S. Pihlaja

I don’t think the personal lives of musicians should affect our enjoyment of their music. The two are seperate things: one exists as a person tied to their own choices and personality, the other begins the property of the artist, but once it is shared, it is reinterpreted in the context of the listener: it becomes the property of the listener because they construct the meaning surrounding it.

Rock stars are doing drugs, being exceptionally rude to people, having illict sex… whatever else you might not approve of all the time off camera. I think a drunk Kanye West being an ass on TV is not a reason to think any less of his music. He was and will likely always be an ass, as probably is true of 70 0r 80% of the artists we all listen too. If you’re going to delete music based on the rudeness of an artist, shouldn’t this apply across the board?

http://intensedebate.com/people/loswhit loswhit

Yes.
It should.
But I'm not that smart.

http://www.mysonabsalom.com S. Pihlaja

I missed that you were saying that deleting Kanye was a dumb thing to do in the post… sorry about that.

Anyway, the more important point here is that I don't think Beyonce's video was THAT good anyway. Certainly not worth throwing your career away…

http://deweberdesign.com deWeb

i love how you deleted the music that you paid for, that you listen to, that he doesn’t have any idea that you ever bought in the first place…just to show him that you’re pissed at him. i do stupid stuff like that all the time.

good post.

i’m a joke, too.
http://twitter.com/shanesanchez @shanesanchez

Kanye is a normal person. He has normal problems. He just doesn't live a normal life. There are other people who do things just a stupid. The difference is he had a bigger platform. It doesn't make his problems any bigger than the next person it just amplifies the effects.
http://www.stephenbrewster.me brewster

LOVE THIS POST DUDE! Your Right. I blogged about this today as well.

I hope he wins the Grammy and Miley Cyrus punks him for the mic.
http://therealjonnymac.com Jon McCallon

Carlos, great blog man, especially the raw honest looks at your life as a songwriter/follower of Jesus.

Here’s the deal, I watched that live last night, and my eyes saw something different. I know Kanye acts like a fool all the time, and Celebrity apologies, well really any public figure’s apology tend to always feel like the act of someone else telling them its the right thing to do. Last night I saw a host in Jay Leno, come across in a way that was almost grandfather like. When he brought up his mom, the raw emotions of loosing her rushed to the surface and the man who always has something to say was speechless. His body language was different and the heart of who he is was finally revealed. It is broken.

I watched my wife loose her mom up close and personal the night before we married. I also watched as we dealt with that loss like fools refusing to just simply own a broken heart.

Public apologies from public people have rightly given us blurred vision when it comes to their hearts. At the end of the day I feel like the lens cleared up enough to see, a man without a father and a mother, who has never embraced the pain, the brokenness.

How could we be so heartless.

Kanye, I love your creativity, and your credibility, your actions and words frustrate me, and at the end of the day, I want you to know, Jesus is still madly in love with you and wants you to fall into his arms.

Thanks.
http://www.6yearmed.blogspot.com 6YearMed

I cannot name a single Kanye West song or Taylor Swift for that matter and probably couldn't identify either in a line up, so I don't get to have much say in that topic.

Now this is probably not the time or the place, but I just have a question for you, Carlos. When did "porn" become Christianese for "the cool sin?" Is that too harsh? Do you agree? I feel like every time I turn around, some mega church pastor or mega church blogger is confessing about a porn addiction, like it's the new Prayer of Jabez. I do not doubt that your intentions are true and good, Carlos. Not for a second. However I would be careful how you portray this delicate portion of your story. It's not the newest Apple product or Hosanna record or whatever. It's your story and it's important. Not a fad. At least I don't think you want it to be.

http://Www.ragamuffinsoul.com Los

Well. I don’t know about megachurch pastors or mega church bloggers. But I do know about me and my homies. And I do know that it is THE one that jacks us up the most often. I wish it were pride, envy, jealousy, did I spell that right?, or anger. But it’s not. It’s lust and pornography is the easiest mist accesible way to dance that jig.
I guess maybe you are saying that I shouldn’t just fling that part of my story out there like I did.
Which, coming from you, I respect. Because you have been around here for a while.
But I guess I also do see it as just part of the story.
So “cool” sin? I don’t know.
Most enjoyed sin?
Definately.
Thanks for your words friend.
Los

http://www.6yearmed.blogspot.com 6YearMed

Well, I am thinking we are not seeing eye to eye on this one, and someday we will just have to hash it out over coffee and NO I will not look at your mole.
http://www.notsodivadarcie.blogspot.com Darcie

Ok, so I’m good at making lists, so that’s what my reply will be all about.
Preface:
#1-I am definitely more sinner than saint and need God’s grace as much (if not more) than everyone else. I am not here to judge.
#2-I’m not a super cool blogger so that might make me lose some credibility
#3-I may sound like a hater, but I’m not (I totally mailed you my reindeer antlers awhile back!)

Main Points:

#1-I totally agree with 6yearmed. Porn addiction seems like it is a cool sin that proves the virility of Christian men, all in the comfort of the Church.

#2-I appreciate your openess and that you share so much about your life, but sometimes opening up to large groups about our sin acts as a card for other people to feel ok about their sin. I don’t want to feel alienated in my sin, but I also don’t want to feel ok about it. Sin is ugly and dirty and, yes, we are under grace, but should we sin more so grace can abound? I feel like porn being the new “cool” sin allows people to say, “Carlos did it, I don’t feel so bad about myself.” Kind of an “I’m ok. You’re ok. We’re all ok” kind of attitude, which can be dangerous.

#3-Porn addiction is real and I understand that it’s a HUGE problem. But it still hurts. Men who broadcast their porn addiction almost like a badge hurt the women who love them. Share it with those who keep is accountable and need to know, but don’t broadcast it. Women already struggle with feeling “good enough” (heck, men and women all struggle with that) and knowing that the men women should feel safest with are oogling over (and liking it!) a false idea of sexual perfection hurts. A lot.

Ok, I’m getting off of my rant box

http://intensedebate.com/people/klreed189 klreed189

I can see where both sides are coming from. I think the reason most people talk about porn and there struggles is because pretty much every guy has struggled with it. Don't take my words out of context here, but it is almost like lying, we have all done it. I heard about a church planting network (acts 29) asking the applicants not if they struggle with porn, but when did they and what they did to work on not struggling with porn. It is a devastating thing, to know the destruction it causes and the lives that it ruins, but it seems to be the most easily accessed thing and a lot of people know the struggle. I appreciate Carlos being very open about it and calling it out. I do think that it can be seen as a cool thing to struggle with, almost like we are justified because others struggle with it. But I hope that through the honesty of many bloggers people will see the destruction that it brings and not the fake temporary pleasure.

http://www.jakeschwein.com @jakeschwein

POTSC…good stuff
http://mommaliss.blogspot.com Elissa

PREACH… and Amen!
http://intensedebate.com/people/evambrose evambrose

Way to tie that in there Los. I've read and agreed with many responses on here and I completely agree that he should be forgiven and hope that's worked out between the two of them. I'm just glad that Beyonce had the class to stand up and invite Taylor out to have her moment again. Agreed, that if we were filmed every time we "opened mouth, insert foot" we might receive the same ridicule. However, as much as Kanye made that moment about himself, it was really about Taylor still…how was she going to react? Would she become unglued or would she maintain her composure and grace? Ultimately, is someone else's "sin" going to throw you off or will it be a springboard for you to grow in to who Y O U are supposed to be?

http://intensedebate.com/people/evambrose evambrose

and…might I add: as far as deleting music or whatev:

applause is not always for the "job well done" but for following a conviction and what you could have said "yes" to but didn't.

http://intensedebate.com/people/Beaconhillnw Jim

i didn't watch vma's …and don't know any of their music…
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=609267842 Natalie Montgomery

You rock! I could not have put it better myself.!
John

As Kanye said quite a while ago – "God, show me the way, cuz the Devil's tryin' to break me down…" We're all punks in our own ways, but Jesus us still walks with us – never leaving us, or Kanye. Isn't God's grace good?
~Peace~

Carlos Whittaker

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